The Test 

by Charissa Nasrallah               

“There was one more test I needed to pass before I could get what I was after,” and though I’m not particularly superstitious, it wasn’t long after I read that horoscope when life presented a major test to me on the turn of the millennium.  I can’t help but speculate what type of grade the majority of current humanity would give me towards my efforts.  There have been many tests I been given in my life I did not want to take and at times I have requested to just take the F, and hope for a chance to take it over again, but this was a test I sincerely wanted to pass.

I would like to present the following explanation of a certain sequence of events that occurred in my life.  The story focuses on a very minor occurrence, but it had a big meaning to me, and it had me asking my own questions about the purpose of existence.  To save you any suspense, there are no super-powered -superheroes, bombs, thugs or car chases, and nothing gets killed except an alligator.  However I am a well-seasoned storyteller, and though I might dance off on a tangent here or there, I’ll try my best to make it an efficient and brief case study.

To start I will state that I am fixated on the notion that I am only one person, out of several billion at the moment.  My personal impact on this planet will be minimal, but I am sincerely striving to make it positive.  I am an ecological extremist and a bit of an eccentric, since picking up litter fills me with an odd sense of purpose.  I also recycle to the degree where one might consider it an obsessive-compulsive disorder.  Often times I find myself pulling various reusable objects out of other peoples trash, despite the fact it is an insanely unsanitary thing to do.

I was well aware there were moments when I got far too carried away with my actions, like the time I kicked the plate out of my fathers hands when he attempted to serve me swordfish, or the time I risked being run over by a car in order to spare a caterpillar.  I have always taken a strong stand on my convictions, but I try to examine my actions on a regular basis in order to understand how I may avoid the inefficiency of misdirected actions such as these in the future.

I can’t deny I wanted to be a superhero, an environmental super hero especially, but there were several times when I question my motives for wanting to be this way. I am a big wildlife fan, and there are numerous times I find myself wishing I lived in a time where there was more of it around. There was a strong part of me that was mysteriously attracted to the wilderness, which gave me a fevered desire to want to protect it.  And there was another conceded part of me that made me feel I actually had something worthwhile to say to humanity concerning our effects on our surroundings. 

I once received some advice from an older lady, part Cherokee, who claimed that recognition on earth would take away from the recognition received in the afterlife, and I agreed with this idea of hers to some extent.  During our conversation she proceeded to inform me computers were the work of the devil, but I didn’t follow her thoughts on that philosophy.  I have always thought the world produces many things that can be used for good or bad, it all depends on how we chose to react to them.

sustainable living - natural living - eco living - earth friendly  - ecological - green living

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